anger is the body's fundamental physiological response to a perceived threat to you your loved ones your property your self-image your emotional safety or some part of your identity this fight-or-flight response prepares your body to fight or flee from a perceived threat to your survival it's an alarm that tells you that something is wrong the fight-or-flight activates the sympathetic nervous system releasing chemicals such as adrenaline noradrenaline and cortisol causing a series of very dramatic physiological changes uncontrolled anger however is a toxic and destructive force that ruins intimate relationships and has a negative impact on emotional and physical health learning to control this toxic anger is an important part of emotional growth and allows for the development of intimate and trusting relationships with the people in our lives here are a few tips that can help you learn to manage toxic anger take a breath calm your mind and think just giving yourself a few moments can help reduce the level of anger we feel and allows us to respond rather than react talk about how you're feeling use i statements about how you feel rather than blaming others or being critical get some exercise the endorphins release during exercise calms our physiology and gives you time to calm down anger acts to cover other feelings like sadness embarrassment and anxiety look under your anger for the more vulnerable feelings that anger acts to defend you from remember if you're feeling defensive it's a sign that your brain is no longer thinking critically anticipate triggers if you can predict it you can prevent it spend some time noticing situations that trigger your anger knowledge is power and knowing your triggers gives you the power to better choose your attitude of mind focus on solutions rather than the cause of your anger so next time you feel your anger rising to a toxic level practice some of these behaviors before [Music] reacting you